I just found out that I officially passed IS!

Being someone who has devoted several years of his life to the study of the ways in which people communicate (with themselves, with each other, in groups, and through various media), I find that the way in which people introduce themselves has special meaning. Especially when starting something that intends to be the first interaction of many. This process bears particular interest when dealing with Internet communication, because there comes a point when self-disclosure of some kind must occur. In several ways, I have already begun. So far, from this post, a careful reader could have picked out that I'm male, that I study communication, and that I tend to ramble.

Now I'll begin in earnest.
Call me Kell. I'm a male, in my early 20's, currently romantically attached to a pleasant young woman who I will only name as T. I'm graduating from college in a few short weeks with a degree in Communication Studies. I'm beginning to write in this blog with the primary intention of having a way in which I can keep in contact with my friends and family as I get off my academic butt and become what I'm told is a "productive member of society," whatever that means.

I think that's enough for now, and therefore I'm done. In the future, should I remember to post, I'll no doubt fill these digital pages with random rants and simple updates on my life. In short, whatever I feel like.
Enjoy!

She's a fun one. Just hope she doesn't get bored with me.

From here on out, ever day, I will do something better than I've done it before. It doesn't have to be massive improvement. I doesn't have to be a huge change, it's just one thing that I did better. Last night I made a point of getting to sleep at a better time so I could get up early to work. Today I made a point of going to library and working for most of the day. True, I still got distracted at times, but I got more work done than I would have if I'd stayed in my room.
Tomorrow, who knows what I'll do better at?
But I KNOW that I'll do something better. Be it classwork, exercise, diet, courtesy, social interaction, waking up on time, or something else.
I WILL improve myself, in some way, every day, for as long as I can.

Imagine, if you will, a figure walking alone at night. He walks slowly, with a relaxed but purposeful gait. Your gaze starts at his feet, where he is wearing Adidas sambas that are somewhat beat-up and black socks beneath a slightly rumpled pair of khakis. Your sight continues upwards, where you see his hands, encased in black leather gloves, now hooked by the thumbs into the pants of his khakis, now swinging comfortably at his sides. Next you see a leather jacket with large pockets on the front, and scratched up elbows, that fits well to his broad shoulders. You can't tell, but you think he's of about average weight, maybe a tad chubby. Your gaze continues, noticing the high neck of a fleece vest tucked tight to his chin. The chin sports a rough brown/blonde goatee, his cheeks a little rough with absent-minded fuzz from the last time he forgot to shave. His mane of gold/brown hair is just starting to get shaggy at this point, and is poking out from underneath a black fedora. His back is straight, his head up, glancing around him. At this point, he pauses, and turns back towards you partially, looking over his shoulder. His face is solemn, thoughtful, with the barest hints of a smile at the corner of his mouth, but you imagine that while he often looks like this, it's not unaccustomed to a grin. He looks at you, and a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth, his hand reaching up to tug the brim of his hat down a bit in a respectful gesture as his eyes, now blue, now green, meet yours for an instant over his glasses that are somewhere between an oval and a rectangle. There is something in their depths that isn't quite a sparkle. His hand curls up so that only two fingers remain on the brim of his hat, and he turns away and keeps walking as he moves those fingers away from the brim with a flick of his wrist, extending his arm as he does it. The gesture looks habitual, and brings a hint of a smile to your face as keeps walking away. He never looks back, but continues walking forward until you turn away.

It would seem that I am now 22 years of age.

Wahoo.

If the amount of enthusiasm I have for birthdays continues to follow this particular trend, I wonder if I'll even notice my 30th?


/grin

Happy birthday to me.

^_^

(Note: The Amaranth is a genus of flower whose name comes from the Greek amarantos the "one that does not wither", the never-fading flower)

I. Amaranth Budding

I would gladly continue drifting
till I match the plastic paddle in my hands
I guess the extra sunscreen
wasn’t that bad of an idea
But the landing rushes closer over churning water
while you snooze in the bow
are we approaching it or
is it approaching us?
So I must risk your wrath
and wake you in time to dock


II. Amaranth Blooming

I would gladly sit here
till I turn as red as your sunburned thighs
how you managed to miss
only your hips, I’ll never know
But my skin already resembles someone twice my age
when you climb down into the water and sit on my feet
apparently more comfortable than
any of the other seats in the Jacuzzi
So I must feel your wrath again
and rescue my near-boiled hide


III. Amaranth Weathering

I would gladly keep kneeling by your side
till I lose all feeling below my knees
standing up to leave
is going to hurt
But the work you have yet to do
blinks emptily at us from your screen
though I think my head more
deserving of your lap than the computer
So I must leave again,
and let you get to work


IV. Amaranth Withering

A Greek in my place would hand you
an amaranth
freshly cut and
blooming still
But for all its beauty
a cut flower is still dead
I know you better
than you think
So I must feel your loss
and say farewell
------------------------------------------------------------------
Finally! That's more like it. I think this is incarnation #5, but I finally like the way the last stanza works.

(Note: The Amaranth is a genus of flower whose name comes from the Greek amarantos the "one that does not wither", in this case, the never-fading flower)

I would gladly continue drifting
‘til I match the plastic paddle in my hands
I guess the extra sunscreen
wasn’t that bad of an idea
But the landing rushes closer over churning water
while you snooze in the bow
are we approaching it or
is it approaching us?
So I must risk your wrath
and wake you in time to dock


I would gladly sit here
‘til I turn as red as your sunburned thighs
how you managed to miss
only the tops, I’ll never know
But my skin already resembles someone twice my age
when you climb down into the water and sit on my feet
apparently more comfortable
than any of the nearby Jacuzzi seats
So I must feel your wrath again
and save my already boiled hide

I would gladly keep kneeling by your side
'til I lose all feeling below my knees
standing up to leave
is going to hurt
But your lap needs to hold
a computer instead of my head
though I think my head
is more deserving of the place
So I must risk your loss
and let you get to work


I would gladly continue standing here while
you struggle to tell me what I’ve seen you choose
I know you better than
you seem to think
But that familiar crinkle in your eyes
brings fear to mine
it always shows when
you don’t like what you’re saying
So I must feel your loss again
and leave eternity behind.

_________________________________________________
This is actually about the third incarnation of this poem, and I have no idea how many more it will go through before it's done.

"aisaretai demo aisou to shinai"

I would gladly continue drifting
'til I match the plastic paddle in my hands
-I guess the extra sunscreen
wasn't that bad of an idea
But the landing rushes closer over churning water
while you snooze in the bow
-are we approaching it or
is it approaching us?
So I must risk your wrath
-and wake you in time to dock

I would gladly sit here
'til I turn as red as your sunburned thighs
-how you managed to miss
only the tops, I'll never know
But my skin already resembles someone twice my age
when you climb down into the water and sit on my feet
-apparently more comfortable
than any of the nearby Jacuzzi seats
So I must risk your wrath again
- and save my already boiled hide

I would gladly sit here
'til I lose all feeling below my knees
-standing up to leave
is going to hurt
But the paper you have yet to write
Blinks emptily at us from your screen
-morals clash with
desire to stay
So I must risk your loss
-and let you save your grade

I would gladly continue waiting
For you to ponder and decide
-I must smile and
hide the fear behind my eyes
But time is strained
to fit our work and lives
-I cling to hope
and faith in you
So I must risk your loss again
-and leave eternity behind.

I can't let myself feel it just yet. Not yet.

I can let myself feel it later. When I have the time.

sulk

First Name: Karl
Middle Name: Which one?
Nicknames: Leeeroy, Kaelas
Age: 21
Guy or Gal: Guy
Zodiac Sign: Aquarius
Siblings: 1, Brother, James, 1 'adopted' sister, Ting
Pet(s): 2 cats (Slate, Eclipse-detrimentally known as Blackie), 1 Dog, Stella
Hair Color: Gold/Brown, I like to fancy. Probably brown now
Eye Color: Can be called either blue or green.
Height: 5’ 8”-ish
What hand do you write with: right
Hair Length: getting kind of shaggy
Do you bite your nails? occasionally.
Do you stare?: at what?
Do others think you're cute? At least one person does. ^_-
Shoe Size: 9’s.

RELATIONSHIPS:
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? Yes
If so what is their name? Ilana
Are you gay? No.
Have a crush? ::exasperated sigh:: yes.
If so what's their name? I think she knows. Scroll up.

FASHION STUFF:
Where do you shop the most? Amazon.com
Do you think your fashion is cool? ‘Karl’ and ‘fashion’ aren’t typically mentioned in the same paragraph.
Do you have any piercings? No.
Do you have a tattoo? I've considered it.

THE EXTRA STUFF:
Do you do drugs? I believe that caffiene counts.
Do you drink? Every once in a while. Not regularly, or heavily. A leisurely drink over the course of an evening.
What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use? Natural stuff
What are you most scared of? Now why would I put this information on the internet?
If you could go anywhere, where would it be? Right now? I'd stay right here.
How often do you cut your toenails? When they need it.
What are you listening to right now? Nightwish- Amaranth
Who are you talking to right now? Roza via AIM, Ilana when I think it won't distract her.
What time is it? 12:33
Do you have your own phone line? I'm at college. So yes.
What is in your pockets right now? One Pen, two mechanical pencils,my keys, my wallet, cellphone
What shoes do you wear? Whatever works. Usually Adidas Sambas these days. I like Clarks though. I've also got some boots for the rainy days.
What clothes do you sleep in? Boxers & a T-shirt, sometimes flannel pj pants.
What kind of car do you have? my feet
Who is the last person who called you? Ilana
Where do you want to get married? Outdoors. If possible.
Are you in school? Yep, College of Wooster.
Favorite Celebrity? Umm....
If you could change anything about yourself what would it be? I'd like to be more productive and driven. And I'd like to be a bit more sure of myself. And perhaps I should hit the gym a bit more.
Who do you really hate? I do have a few people I hate, but I don't particularly want to talk about it.
What are the ugliest names? the ones with about 20 consonants in a row and atomic symbols. (heh, Sienfeld)

FAVORITES:
Colour: Deep green, the silver-blue of moonlight on water, sort of golden/silver/greenish like sunrise on dewdrops, blue sky with a wisp of cloud, dappled sunshine on leaves, that sort of thing.
Number: None, really.
Song: Emilie Autumn- “What If”, Nightwish- "Nemo," "Amaranth"
Movie: Real Genius, Much Ado About Nothing, The Last Samurai,
Candy: ::shrugs::
Brand: whatever; I don’t loose sleep over it.
TV show: Ok, college. Yeah. Fullmetal Alchemist, Bones, Heroes, Avatar: the Last Airbender
Food: Simple things.
Fast food restaurant: Fazoli's!
Nail polish color: None. I don’t even notice the stuff. Well, I've started to, but I don't think about it.
Sports team: I don’t really follow sports.
Subject in school: IS or Interpersonal Communication
Good Number: does umpteen count?
Piece of clothing: vest
Animal: Otter, Owl, Lion
Hobbies: CCG's, RPG's, Fencing, Macintosh Computers (games, design, etc), SCUBA, Drama Tech, Baking, Contradancing. A few others that I've likely missed.
Scents: thunder in the air, freshly washed hair (noone in particular, it’s just a nice scent.), fresh-baked anything, almond, lilly
Bath or Shower? Shower for daily use, bath to relax and de-stress.
Teacher: Bostdorf
Game: World of Warcraft

MORE EXTRA STUFF:
Smoked? Yes. Blech, makes your mouth feel like ash.
Drank? Yes.
Ran from the cops? They still haven’t got any dirt on me.
Tried to kill yourself? I plead the fifth.
Made yourself throw up? I guess so, but that was SO disgusting...
Gone skinny dipping? I’ve got plans to...
Been In Love? I’m not sure. Since I believe that the term implies multidirectional, does it count If I say “I love you” to someone, and they can't say it back?
Made yourself cry to get out of trouble? No, I’ve never been able to make myself cry.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF, WHEN YOU HEAR THESE WORDS:
Red: Anger. Love.
Cow: Moo. Farms, Pastures. Cheese, Wooster.
Pig: bacon, oink?
Rubber: trees, bouncing, rubber ball

WHICH IS WORSE:
Barfing on your date or date barfing on you? Barfing on date. That's against all codes of Chivalry, right?
Having your Tonsils or your appendix removed? I wouldn’t know...

YOUR FRIENDS
Coolest: I don't know. What counts as cool?
Weirdest: Roza
Funniest: Kenny
Smartest: Kenny
Happiest: Unsure...
Meanest: Ting. Wuv u Meizi!
Sweetest: Ilana
Has the funniest laugh: Unsure.
Quietest: Ilana
Silliest: Kenny
Cutest: Ilana
Who do you go to for advice: Been a while. Kenny, Roza, Ilana
Who knows all your secrets? Ilana comes close.

WHEN YOU HEAR THIS NAME, YOU THINK OF...
Steve: The guy who introduced me to FA, and made me enjoy it.
Lindsay: 1st crush, 1st grade.
Jeremy: My computer guru.
Missy: Melissa, Lannon's ex-roommate- crazy girl
David: ex-Hordemaster & fencing teacher, current friend.
Pat: Pat’s Perch (ask me later, if you want to hear a funny story)
Roxette: Who?

HAVE YOU EVER...
Caused a car accident? No.
Seen the ocean? Yes. I kind of miss it now though.

THIS OR THAT
Night or Day: Dawn, dusk. Transitions are good.
Chocolate Chip or Mint Chip? Mint Chip.
Ocean or lake? Ocean for waves, lake for calming down and swimming.
Chocolate or vanilla? Vanilla. Hands down
Lion or Tiger? Lions are nobler, but tigers are craftier... I’ve always been a tiger fan, but when I look at it that way, Lion.
Love or lust? Love. Lust has too many bad side effects and a bad reputation.
Silver or gold? Silver, it’s not as gaudy.
Pencil or pen? Pens for notes, pencil for sketching.
Skirt or jeans? Jeans.
Rose or daisy? Rose. Or wait, how about a third option? Water Lily!

IN THE PAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU...
cried? no
Bought Something: No, actually
Worn a skirt? Nope.
Gone for a walk? Yep
Gone for a drive? Nope.
Gone out for dinner? Does Lowry count?
Taken a test? Does this count?
Talked to an ex? Technically, but it's a demeaning term.
If you were a gardening tool, what would you be? A watering can, I love water and that way I’d get to smell flowers all the time. (no connotations intended) A rake would be fun though, lie around and suprise people when they step on me, hmm in some ways I'm already like that....
Watched your favourite movie? No
Given someone a present? No. I should though.
Missed someone? Yes
Hugged someone? Yes.
Kissed someone? Yes
Danced with someone? Tango's tomorrow
Had a nightmare? No. Strange dream, yes, nightmare, no.
Fought with your parents? Nope. Not many fights when you're in different area codes.

THE FEELING SIDE
What do you feel about the Ouija board? Never really used one.
Do u believe in yourself? I'm not sure I trust myself, but I think I believe in myself.
Best feeling in the world: Knowing that a friend cares about you.
Are you for world peace? I think so, there’s already too much death without people killing each other.
Are you a health freak? Not really, but I’ve been trying to adopt a healthier lifestyle.

THE FINAL QUESTION
Do you like filling these out? They’re good for making me see myself better.

Ah well, this night's plan backfired. I went to bed early, figuring that if I was falling asleep at 9 pm, I should perhaps go to sleep early, and get up early enough to finish the work I had left. I figured 4 hours would be plenty of time to finish mopping up the extra little bits that I hadn't finished.

Turns out I got a lot more than 4 hours.

I went to sleep at about 9 PM. I woke up around 3 AM. I couldn't get back to sleep.

I now had about 7 hours to get everything done. >.<

So here I am basically finished already, and it's 7.

What now?

More like stupid Karl.

It's really annoying. When you're trying to maintain a goatee, and you mess up one side of it, you have thee options: leave it be and look odd, shave the other side to match, and shave it all off.

I chose option B. Now it looks like I'm trying to grow handlebars. >.<

Bugger.

Well, I'm back at Wooster. The summer ended well. Or at least, it did in my mind. I got to spend 5 days with Ilana in California, and that was a treat. Although it's going to take a while to get used to sleeping on my own again. I kinda got used to it. Not that it's going to be an issue tonight. The weather in Wooster is scorching.

But the trip was enjoyable. I got to California, went to Tahoe with Ilana and her family, spent an enjoyable weekend there. Although the fire was right nearby (though nothing bad came of it), and the trip to San Francisco City flopped a bit, the experience was a good one: I got to spend time with Ilana and get to know her family a little bit. Though it's her turn to visit me next. /grin

Now I'm back in Wooster, in my new room, wondering how I'll end up getting all my stuff and my roommate's stuff to fit. It's decently small. And it's hot.

The weather here is stifling. 99% humidity, 78˚ indoors. And there's little to no breeze in my room. Even with the door wide open.

I'm looking forward to my classes this semester. Interpersonal Communication, Senior IS, Personal Conditioning, and Intro to Fictional Writing. All of them should be fun, and definitely enjoyable. At the moment I'm waiting for some of my friends to get back, though they likely just forgot to give me a call when they got back on campus. Perhaps I should call them to find out.

Maybe I'll just hit the hay and see if the heat is better when I wake up.

Ok, fun night.

Staff outing, go karts, bumper cars, laser tag, an hour of cooperative shooter games, and finally, roller skating.

But roller skating for the first time in more than a decade (ouch), and falling down a lot, leaves an annoying number of bruises/ pulled muscles. It also makes it rather difficult to sit down.

Which becomes annoying when people are making you uncomfortable by joking about a) the fact that it's my butt that hurts, and b) the 14 year old girl who was hitting on every guy there on the staff outing, especially the older of us. That bit was creepy.

Happily seeing someone, thanks. And btw, you shouldn't be hitting on someone 150% your age. That's just weird.

But yeah. I think I bruised another bone. That makes two in three weeks. Good thing I'm not brittle.

WTseriousF!

My boss just volunteered my break time to some idiots who decided they didn't want to follow the normal procedure.

So I'm taking the only break I can: my lunch break. I'm not taking a working lunch today. Screw them. I'm lying down for an hour.

Hörst du mich?
Spürst du mich?
Wenn du mich nicht mehr Liebst hast, warum störst du mich?

Dammit! Why does a figure I had firmly placed into my past decide to show up and cause hell on a weekend where I have no leeway to deal with this kind of crap?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gg5_mlQOsUQ

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Despite the fact that I like the band, and know the actual song, that's still damn funny.